Procrastination

After close to a month of postponement, the time came when I just had to, without exception, clean, or atleast, make my room clutter free.

The first step was the easiest, making the room messy, bringing it to the sorry state, dusty, disorganised. Then was the long, legendary battle, the will to clean and organise pitted against pure and soulful laziness. Laziness strengthens over time. Once you begin to realise that life isn't that bad even in a room in disarray, the laziness not only feels justified, but begins to eat into the modest reserves of determination you possess. Even if the room bordered on uninhabitable, making one corner a little more messy while giving the relatively clean (yet absolutely chaotic) remains of the room to yourself makes you see the wisdom in not cleaning the room. It begins to feel unnecessary.

Di-Nitrogen and Di-Hydrogen, being inert at room temperature, require high temperature as well as high pressure to react to form ammonia gas, that too in the presence of iron catalyst as well as a molybdenum promoter. And yet, under all this conditions, only a fraction of N2 and H2 react. The magic of Haber's process comes after this, exothermic nature of the reaction leading to it stabilizing the necessary pressure and temperature condition, and ammonia is formed uninhibited, almost regenerated at every step.

Here too, I needed the right weather, mood, favourable conditions of pending work, a full stomach, physical capacity as well as 4 straight hours of leisure to actually get things started. And after I was assured of all these, laziness had to be overcome. Once that happened, things would flow, much like the ammonia.

And so, on the given day, a certain foreboding to destiny came to me. It hit me, something almost supernatural, that today was to be the day. Today would see me breaking all barriers, finally action, though by no means preemptive, only could save the day.

After a long struggle, fighting through needless papers, old books, poor selection of song by the radio jockey and a pair of spectacles which thought it would be fun to jump off my nose, I was only half way through. 5 of the stipulated four hours were gone, the reaction was slowing down, there was a snag in the ammonia outlet.

An IITJEE aspirant like every other kid in the neighbourhood, city, state and country, the sheer number of books necessary to continue being one, had absolutely no place in my cosy little room, just enough to let me through.

Laziness loves enhancing thoughts, has a great way of making you believe something you well know isn't true.

So I still believe. My habitation of a room where everything is organised except my books, which form almost all of my possessions, is true to testimony to this fact.

I continue to procrastinate for I believe, my books don't have enough space.

The battle goes on

Student repression

Wiki defines symbiosis as "close and often long-term interaction between biological species". And further down the article, the words "mutualistic" and "inter-dependent" crop up.

As far as I am concerned, symbiosis is a class-room relationship between me (who can write) and my friend (who can draw). I write speeches for them and he/she does my biology diagrams. And my chest swells with pride when the class and teacher alike appreciate someone else's speech in the knowledge that it is my brain-child.

But perhaps I went too far when one particular friend asked me for a speech by writing this speech on "Student repression". Presenting it to the class would certainly have drawn the teacher's ire in the form of a sincere defense of the school that puts bread on her plate. So, I present it to my more open-minded, yet modest and sparse blog readership

Student Repression

The clash of civilisations is nowhere as evident as in India, western living based on an urban, fast-paced life having infiltrated into age old Indian culture which places emphasis on values rather than situations. The social hierarchy painstakingly evolved through almost 6000 years of civilisation is crumbling.

While it has lead to some reforms for the betterment of society such as the abolition of sati and untouchability, the values which just one generation ago we laid so much stress on have simply evaporated. And the new generation, the children of globalisation, know no inhibition. Even when it comes to elders, especially teachers.

The spirit of inquiry has certainly made its mark. Whether it will be good in the long run or not is yet to be seen, right now tumultuous scenes in the classrooms are the order of the day.

A cultural shock for the teachers, they are seeing defiance and indifference to their words on a large scale, something they could never have imagined doing or happening.

But instead of adapting to the new age, teachers and institutions alike are taking more and more stringent means to control and discipline the children, leaving the young minds feeling compressed and isolated. Military establishment like measures and continuous surveillance by teachers has left students feeling insecure and forever ill at ease.

While not going as far as corporal punishment, in these overly strict and disciplined environment, the youth lose their most prized asset, uninhibition. Mentally, it leaves them tortured by self-doubt and full of apprehension.

It is here, in the mind, that in my opinion is where the real damage happens. When this new, first globalised generation of India begin their transition from being the future to being the present, they will be confused whether to follow their parents and teachers, all values, grit and discipline, or to go with the current, free and spirited.

Either way, the fear imbibed in them in their formative years will forever linger with them. The new generation of India will be bold, active in their role of citizens, no doubt. But they will always take that occasional glance over their shoulder, where their teachers always were, attempting in vain to convert perceived donkeys into horses by rubbing their backs with soap. The shackles of their repression will never leave them.