One memory stayed with me from my previous trip to Lucknow. I was sleeping at the marriage hall when an old man, a relative of my friend from Varanasi who had just got married that day, snapped at me. "What's that?" he asked sharply, pointing at my wallet and phone which I had kept near my head. I was sleep-deprived and the frigid December air had sapped the last of my energy reserves. I tiredly replied that it was my wallet and my phone. "Keep it inside!", he bellowed. A stranger was yelling at me.
I kept my wallet inside my pocket. He was not happy. "What's that?". Pointing at my phone. I was in no mood to repeat my answer. I wanted it near my head for my alarm. He yelled at me to keep it under my blanket, well hidden from view. I didn't understand, since all the people in the room were his relatives and friends, invited by my friend for the wedding. Surely, it was in no danger. Didn't he trust his own family? Perhaps he heard my thoughts. "Yeh Lucknow hai, koi bhi utaa le saktha hai. Agar Varanasi subah hai, toh Lucknow shaam hai." (This is Lucknow, anyone can pick it up. If Varanasi is the morning, Lucknow is the evening)
My fatigue, his sentences belted out in rapid Hindi and my perplexity at his choice of words sent my head into a tizzy. I decided to grab what sleep I could before my early morning flight, his continuing rants about Lucknow and Uttar Pradesh and India notwithstanding. But the words echoed in my head, trying to understand what it means. "Agar Varanasi subah hai, toh Lucknow shaam hai". Varanasi is the morning, Lucknow is the evening? I dozed off.
On the current trip, I was worried. The news reports emanating from UP are rarely positive. This time, the marriage was at a small town near Lucknow and the train was scheduled to reach there early in the morning. I was travelling alone. I had tried in vain to remember the name of the station, but it never stuck. Some town named after a female deity. Meenakshi? No, that was too South Indian. I gave up and slept, setting my alarm for the early morning halt.
It would be a miracle if the train made it under 4 hours late. The fog was thick and every deserted station was a scheduled stop. I had to travel in this passenger train if I needed the train to stop at my destination. I could have gotten down at Lucknow or Kanpur and taken a comfortable taxi ride, but I thought this would be a better way of having a new experience. Immersing myself in the land. We all make foolish decisions. For some reason, as Uttar Pradesh drew nearer, a sense of foreboding exploded in my mind. Varanasi morning, Lucknow evening. The land of darkness? The land that's about to be destroyed? I slept.
When I woke up, the day was bright outside. The train was at a small station. I pulled out my phone and frantically searched for my friend's message naming the station to get down at. I found it. Some lady deity, starting with M. It escapes my memory now. "Is it M station?", I hurriedly asked my sleepy co-passenger. He grunted. I grabbed my bag and ran to the door. The train began to move. I said a prayer to Goddess M and jumped out. Safe landing. The train seemed to zoom away in earnest now that I'd left it.
A girl appeared at the door. She was really beautiful. She was carrying a large bag. She wanted to get down as well. Her hair and white dupatta were already flying in the cold wind as the train picked up speed. She hadn't even had time to put on something warm. Come to think of it, neither had I.
I ran and took her bag. Then offered my hand. She gripped it firmly and jumped out. I handed her bag to her and tried to smile at her, my mind calculating how old she might be. She hurriedly walked away, her white dress melting away into the fog.
I shrugged and gathered my thoughts. If Varanasi is the morning, Lucknow is the evening. The words would not stop echoing. Well, it was early morning near Lucknow, so perhaps the outlook was not as bleak. Still, the deep sense of foreboding persisted. The cold was bitter. I put on my jacket and gave my body a new lease of life.
The station was beautiful and deserted. A shady, wooded area began where the platform ended. I could see the colourful outline of what was surely a temple. Perhaps it was the temple of Goddess M. Frustratingly, the name still eluded my memory despite reading it just under a minute ago.
I decided to walk in the direction of the temple. Was there a station building? An exit? Were autos available? I thought of calling my friend, but then decided against it. Why disturb him on his wedding day unless I'm completely lost. I was armed with the address of the marriage hall.
I finally saw a person. He looked like a respectable man. I was relieved to see him. I approached him to ask for directions. For some reason, I slowed down as I moved closer to him. I was acting on pure instinct here. Lucknow is the evening. This was Lucknow district. My body began to shiver involuntarily. I moved closer. He was wearing white too, with a welcoming smile, but for some reason, without showing his teeth.
He was looking straight at me, then turned a little to the left and spat. The paan left his mouth in a glorious stream. His blood-red teeth betrayed the pratice he had of spitting the paan. The image of respectability immediately deserted him and I was on my guard. Which was a good thing. The next thing I knew, a knife flashed in his hand and he moved towards me.
I was too alert. I ran, quite fast despite my bag and jacket. He was making up ground on me, but that was due to his head-start. I was young and sprightly, he was a middle-aged man. I thought of losing the bag, but decided against it. Let's see how long the chase is on. Should I shout? Would that attract helpful by-standers or more thieves and muggers? I was in Lucknow. Immersing in the land indeed.
I was just beginning to tear away when I lurched forward violently and fell, tripping over seemingly nothing. Shit, I'm done for!
The lurch of the train had woken up half the compartment. I woke up sweating despite the frigid cold even inside the AC coach. I searched for my phone in my pocket. It was missing. I sat up and smashed my head on the roof of the train. I cursed. Bloody upper berth, freezing cold and my phone's gone! Then I felt it near my arm.
It had just fallen out of the pocket. Phew! I looked at the time. 4:38 AM. I calmed down. I was going to get down at Lucknow and take a cab.